No, Not a Cleanse! Never Again!

My mom had to go on a cleanse, thanks to some recommendations to help her with her menopause.  My sister and I, being the nice people that we are, decided to do the cleanse with her. My hopes for this cleanse is that it will help clear my face and help with my energy levels.  I feel like I’m constantly breaking out these days and I’m always tired once I hit the afternoon.  Plus, maybe I’ll save my kidneys since I’m giving up caffeine for a week.

Day one (Tuesday) – Day one wasn’t that bad for any of us in fact it was probably helpful for me since I was sick. The broth was basically like soup to me and because I couldn’t taste anything the carrot juice tasted fabulous.  The changes seen included going pee a lot and that’s about it.

Day two (Wednesday) – Day two was a different story. We all struggled much more on day two. We had insane conversations about missing cheese  and  butter so much butter. We talked about these things like we hadn’t had them in months but it really it was just 2 days ago.  We’re pathetic!  I’m so pathetic in fact, that when I went to the grocery store I purchased some gelato for when we can celebrate being done with this cleanse… which is still five more days away. Yikes!  The changes for this day included going pee a lot and my face is clearing up a little bit. Thank goodness for that because it’s been really bad lately.  I also had caffeine withdrawal headaches throughout the day, but they weren’t that bad.

Day three (Thursday) – Is this cleanse over yet?  For real, I feel like I haven’t had food in weeks.  Crap, we still have 4 more days left (no pun intended.)  I’m dreaming about desserts.  The changes for this day include: I am starting to feel better, my nose isn’t as stuffed up, my eyes don’t seem to be watering as much and my sore throat is pretty much gone. Also, my energy levels have gone up a little bit but that could also just be because I’m feeling better. I didn’t have any noticeable changes in my complexion today though unfortunately.  Can’t it be day seven already?

Day four (Friday) – I dreamed of chocolate cake last night.  “I don’t even like chocolate cake that much” I say as I groan in misery.  This cleanse will be the death of me. My complexion appears to be getting worse.  I got lots of whiteheads on my face and there was actually one of my arm too…ew.  There hasn’t been many other noticeable changes.  I’m still sick, but gradually getting better.

Day Five (Saturday) – My roommate offered me a cookie and I felt like crying.  Hopefully, there will still be a cookie left once this cleanse is over and I can enjoy it thoroughly.  I didn’t see much in the way of changes this day, but I am thankful that it’s almost over.  Only two more days!

Day Six (Sunday) – I’ve discovered throughout this cleanse that breakfast and supper are my favorite meals of the day.  I think this is because there’s one kind of splurge at each breakfast and supper, but none for lunch.  For breakfast the splurge is the hard boiled eggs and supper is a piece of toast.  As far as changes go, my complexion appears to be getting better again and that’s about it.  Unfortunately, I don’t have loads of energy yet like the cleanse proposed would happen.

Day Seven (Monday) – Halleluja, we’re on the home stretch!  The changes I’ve seen throughout this cleanse include that my face has cleared a little, I feel like I’ve possibly toned up with out doing more workouts then normal, and that’s about it.  I’m contemplating gelato for breakfast tomorrow.  It sounds like a good idea to me.

The Dreaded Cleanse

Here it is, the dreaded cleanse.  My Mom, sister, and I went on a cleanse for a week and this is what it consisted of.  Also note, that there will another blog post about the effects of the cleanse coming in the following week.

Breakfast

• Lemon Juice & Water – Fifteen minutes before you are ready to eat breakfast, squeeze the juice of a lemon into a medium glass of hot water and drink.
• Carrot Juice – Drink at least 8 ounces.
• Boiled Eggs – Eat 2 hard boiled eggs.
• Fresh Fruit – Eat at least one-half pound of fruit.  This can be one type of fruit or multiple types of fruit, but NO bananas or avocado.  Why no bananas or avocado, you ask?  Beets me (haha, I made a pun), this isn’t my cleanse.

Between breakfast and lunch you should drink all the Vegetable Broth (recipe below) you can hold.  Also eat fresh, raw vegetables and fruit.  The more of these taken in, the more thorough the cleansing.

Lunch

• Vegetable Broth – Drink two cups during the meal.
• Salad – Make a chopped salad of fresh, raw vegetables.  Eat at least 1/2 cup, or more if you want.  Use four of these vegetables: Artichokes, asparagus, beans, beets, broccoli, brussel sprouts, cabbage, carrots, cauliflower, cucumbers, celery, endive, egg plant, fresh corn, fresh green peas, green peppers, kale, lettuce, okra, onions, parsley, parsnips, pumpkin, radishes, rutabagas, spinach, squash, swiss chard, tomatoes, turnips.  (Use a dressing of oil, lemon juice, vinegar and salt.)  We used both organic rice vinegar mixed with sesame seed oil and apple cider vinegar mixed with hemp oil for dressing. (NO potatoes allowed…unfortunately.)
• Fruit – Fresh fruit for “dessert.”  No specified amount.

Between lunch and dinner, eat all the fresh raw fruit and vegetables you want, and drink lots of vegetable broth.

Dinner/Supper

• Vegetable Broth – Drink two cups during the meal, more if you desire.
• Cooked Vegetables – Select 2 or 3 of the different kinds listed previously and saute them with olive oil.  Eat a generous helping of each (no potatoes).  (Note: We added salt on our vegetables, not sure we could have got them down without it.)
• Bread – One medium slice of whole grain bread with Earth Balance Spread (optional).  NO BUTTER.
• Fruit – Fresh fruit for “dessert.”  No specified amount.

If you feel hungry after dinner eat fresh raw fruits and vegetables, and drink vegetable broth or water – as much as you want.

Vegetable Broth Recipe –

Also known as a glorified V8 juice that you will hate by the end of this cleanse.

Ingredients:

• 7 carrots (chopped)
• 1 small bunch of celery (chopped)
• 2 Quarts hot water
• 1/3 bunch of parsley
• Large handful of spinach (chopped)
• For flavoring: Pinch of salt, okra, tomatoes, green peppers, or garlic
• 1 Quart of low sodium V8 juice

Directions:

Take the carrots and celery and place in the 2 quarts of hot water on the stovetop.  Boil for 15 minutes.  Then add the parsley and spinach.  Boil for 10 minutes more.  Drain off the juice or broth.  Add the flavorings you desire and mix the V8 juice into the broth.  Viola, broth complete!

Do this cleanse for 7 days and supposedly you will reap tremendous benefits.